FOLLOWING the sad events surrounding the delay in the burial of fitness bunny and socialite Mitchelle Amuli, who was popularly known as Moana, after she was burnt to ashes following a horrific accident in Genius Kadungure’s car, there is need for our communities to introspect.
First, her burial took longer because there was need for DNA test after she together with two other foreign nationals in the car, were burnt beyond recognition.
Then most sections of the community had no kind words for the events that took place at her birthday party following videos which went viral exposing the nudity and shape of her cake.
To them she and her guests automatically become villains.
It is important that we make it clear that as a publication founded on Christian values, we do hold no brief against other religions and alsodo not condone such deviant behaviours.
However, the fights that ensued between the parents that have delayed her burial, have led us to probe the matter more.
The parents who divorced long back are clashing over almost everything; from their religious backgrounds to the place of holding the funeral wake and worse still paternity issues.
In a broader sense, the senseless fights which have now spilled into the courts over her burial beg the question, with such parents was Moana the victim turned villain?
We ask this because information derived from her divorced parents’ public spats is in line with various outcomes of researches by experts on such issues that concluded parents directly and indirectly affect their adolescent’s deviant behaviours.
According to the numerous findings other factors are the adolescent family, community, and peers but the overall factor is parenting.
In the case of Moana which is now panning out, the family structure from the divorce of her parents may have led to a low level of parental attachment and supervision, thus leading toward deviant behaviours.
The father may have unwittingly opened a pandora’s box when he blamed his daughter’s untoward behaviour that led to her divorcing her husband as the cause of her misfortunes.
While it may be true, the same should fly back to Mr Amuli.
We are not the judges of why and who was wrong in both divorces, but surely if we are to go by the father’s assertions, the proverbial case of looking at the speck in another’s eye yet you have a log in your own, applies.
Once a divorce is finalised, a child will then move to living in a single-parent home whose living environments reduce social control and lead to an increase in delinquency.
A single-parent community creates a weak bond with parents or community and exposes the child to deviant behaviours as their self-control is decreased.
Parental support is the largest influence on creating preferable behaviour in adolescents.
The family has an indirect control over peers through their parenting techniques; teaching the child not to succumb to peer pressure. A parent is also a model towards their children.
It is, therefore, the time for our communities to do more in educating parents of the negative impact of divorces on parents and how to better manage such situations.
The government and churches have a critical role to play.
In conclusion, the Bible (New Living Translation) says: Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it.